Don’t mind me...I’m just doing my homework in the bathroom

When I was a kid I HATED doing my homework. After spending 7 hours at school and participating in my after school activities I just wanted to sit and do nothing, watch tv, play games and in high school just sit on aim talking to my friends. Sure it made sense to have homework to make sure you retained all the information during the day and see if you could do it on your own. But my brain was also physically and mentally exhausted. And don’t worry that alarm was going off at 6am the next morning to start it all over.

By the time I got to high school I had a lot more homework and I also had a lot more distractions. I needed to not be overstimulated and not be distracted. I had my own bathroom and when I had a lot of homework and really needed to get in my hyperfocus zone I would sit at my bathroom vanity and do my homework until I finished. I would tell myself I couldn’t leave until I did. You laugh but I’m not gonna lie...it worked really well. I was able to go into hyperdrive and finish my work really quickly. My younger sister also had ADHD but hers was undiagnosed and I mentioned it to her and she laughed at me. Until the next day when she tried it herself.

My mom and grandma and I were all downstairs and I heard my sister screaming ALEX. I need you to come upstairs please!! I finally got upstairs and she wasn’t in her room and I said ``where are you…”I’m in the bathroom”. “Umm did you fall in the shower?” “No, just come in”...There she is sitting on the floor with her textbook and notebooks spread out on the floor. I laughed and said what did you need from me? She replied “I forgot a book downstairs can you go get it?” I couldn’t breathe. I was laughing so hard. But she knew if she got up from the floor and left the room that her hyperfocus would disappear and it would feel impossible to start over. 

I don’t think at the time I really understood what ADHD was. I didn’t really know that other people were not as easily distracted as I was but I was great at improvising and creating new ways for me to succeed. My sister had followed my footsteps on that one and I believe it worked for her from time to time but what was important was how I ended up deciding the bathroom was my homework spot.

So what is the lesson here? Sometimes following what works for one person does in fact work for someone else. If a tactic that is brought to your attention makes sense to you and it is sustainable then go for it. But the most important part is being self aware enough to know what our needs are and asking the right questions to help find solutions that work for you.

In this example I saw the problem which was that I had a lot of homework that I didn’t want to do. I asked myself what was going to make it harder to do the homework I didn’t want to do? The answer was being tempted with distractions such as “aim” on my computer, my phone, or the tv. My desk also had too much clutter that I knew I had to clean but didn’t want to do that either. Cluttered space for me meant a cluttered mind. Operation problem solve mode came into play. Eliminate the distraction by finding the one place in my house that I couldn’t hear anyone else. Somewhere that I couldn’t easily see my computer or anything else that was more interesting than my computer. And then think of a place that I could spread out that had a clear space that I could see everything at once. Suddenly the bathroom vanity was my place. Homework that would normally take me 3-4 hours to do only took me 1-2 hours and I didn’t feel rushed.

I want to help you to get to know yourself well enough to know what is standing in your way and help you solve in a way that works for you.